Every year, International Men’s Day on 19 November offers a moment to highlight men’s mental health and start honest conversations about their emotional wellbeing. The theme for this year, Celebrating Men and Boys, calls attention to the need for recognition, support and understanding across all stages of a man’s life. The day encourages families, communities and workplaces to acknowledge the unique pressures men carry while celebrating their roles, strengths and contributions.
Advocates use the occasion to promote early help seeking, healthier coping strategies and safer spaces where men can express vulnerability without fear.
According to the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB), men account for nearly 72 percent of all suicide deaths in India, underscoring the urgency of addressing men’s mental health and the barriers to help-seeking.
Young men across urban India say they are watching gender expectations evolve in real time. Many feel that the pressure to be the sole provider is not as universal as it once was, yet the weight of old ideas about strength and silence still lingers. Their experiences show how class, upbringing and family security shape what responsibility looks like for different men.
MedBound Times connected with young men from this generation to ask: How do men in the 21st century really feel?
We asked a recent entrant to the workforce how responsibility, pressure and identity feels today.
Mausam Chopra, 24, who has recently started working in a corporate workplace said, "Nowadays I feel that it’s changing, I feel modern perspective is that you should earn enough to support yourself and whatever lifestyle you have, at least in my case, it was never that you have to support your family or something." he said.
"Naturally when you go down the economical and societal hierarchy, people with less privileged backgrounds, the men have the sole responsibility to support the family, so that does put pressure on them, but it comes out of necessity I feel." he added.
Despite growing awareness about mental health, many men say they still struggle with the basic act of expressing what they feel. Cultural messaging plays a strong role, and for some, the pressure to appear composed begins early and follows them into adulthood.
Arindam Roy Chowdhury, 30, who now lives in Canada, described how these norms influence men’s lives. He said, “Men shy away from talking about their emotions because they have been taught to do so. A set example or like a rulebook of how a man should behave or act in the society.” He believed men often redirect their feelings instead of processing them.
He added that society punishes vulnerability:
“Crying or expression of emotions is considered weak for men in our society, they are being mocked in some cases. So a man refrains to express.”
Not all men express emotional restraint for the same reasons. Some stay silent out of habit, some out of fear of judgment, and some because they believe it is simply easier to handle things alone. These differences show how varied the inner lives of men can be, even when the outcome looks the same from the outside.
An anonymous 24-year-old said, men often deal with their emotions quietly, without seeking comfort from others. “Men find the solution on their own, but they just don't talk about it. In the end, every human being finds the solution on their own.” he said.
He described two common ways men cope when feelings become overwhelming. “Either you lock yourself in the room and cry or you escape by doing other things, by being busy in life.”
However he added that he can open up partially with a trusted partner. “If I am very much emotionally attached and she knows much of my life, then I can talk about it, but not overwhelm her with my emotions. Still, I would share 70 percent, not a hundred percent.”
MedBound Times connected with Psychologist Anveeksha (MA Applied Psychology).
She said, "As a psychologist, I think it's transformative for men to be able to show vulnerability without feeling stigmatized because emotional honesty is an integral component of strength rather than being the opposite of it."
She said that change can only happen when transformation occurs at all levels of social interactions. Removing toxic masculinity and patriarchal notions of living has to be everyone's first and main target, but in doing so, it is also important to recognize that the society doesn't target a gender for a systemic injustice.
If you are struggling with emotional distress, India offers several confidential mental-health support options:
KIRAN (Ministry of Social Justice): 1800-599-0019
iCall Counseling Helpline: +91 9152987821
Aasra Suicide Prevention: +91 9820466726
Seeking timely support is a crucial step in improving men’s mental health in India and reducing the long-standing stigma around asking for help.
References:
1. Yamini. “There’s a Silent Crisis of Men’s Mental Health in India.” Down To Earth, October 17, 2024. DownToEarth.org.in. https://www.downtoearth.org.in/health/theres-a-silent-crisis-of-mens-mental-health-in-india
2. Sagar, Rajesh, Raman Deep Pattanayak, R. Chandrasekaran, Pranit K. Chaudhury, Balbir S. Deswal, R.K. Lenin Singh, Savita Malhotra, S. Haque Nizamie, Bharat N. Panchal, T.P. Sudhakar, J.K. Trivedi, Mathew Varghese, Jagdish Prasad, and Somnath Chatterji. 2017. “Twelve-Month Prevalence and Treatment Gap for Common Mental Disorders: Findings from a Large-Scale Epidemiological Survey in India.” Indian Journal of Psychiatry 59 (1): 46-55. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5419012/?
3. National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB). Accidental Deaths & Suicides in India 2022. Ministry of Home Affairs, Government of India. https://ncrb.gov.in
Edited by M Subha Maheswari